#1098 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<hatzis> listen guys i'm really confused
<hatzis> do i vote for the black man
<hatzis> or the woman
<hatzis> i can't decide
<hatzis> the irony really is a bit much
<hatzis> any advice appreciated
<FBIGuy> i vote for the one with the white cock
#2036 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
Raven: i hate dictionary definitions
hannah: lol
Raven: you read a definition of something, then you neeed to look up the word in the definition so you can understand the definition of that word in the definition
Raven: its like a word adventure
Raven: of ignorance and shame
hannah: lol haha
Raven: for being stupid... :(
#1846 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
Error: Gays, I'd like you to meet our Puertorican/Phillipino department.
Empty: do they have guns?
Error: 12" dicks, actually
Empty: brb going to get some guns
#1087 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
newts: This VIP branch is complaining that it's network connections seem to be down ATM.
newts: We failed them to the backup systems which are also not responding.
newts: We failed them to the tertiary systems (they're VIP).
newts: Suddenly it's mentioned that they're in the middle of a hurricane.
newts: Huh.
newts: Wonder if that could be the problem.
#96 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
* &KrypTiK1 gives LolFail a cookie
<+LolFail> Do I want this?
<&KrypTiK1> yes LolFail, you want
* &KrypTiK1 hands LolFail a joint
* +LolFail takes a drag
<&KrypTiK1> is it good, LolFail?
<+LolFail> only when you win the lottery
<&KrypTiK1> rofl
<&KrypTiK1> how does that make you feel LolFail?
<+LolFail> more lubricant
#1536 (+|-) (Rated: 2) [QDigg / QShare]
<Pariah> "Sluts, slut stories, pictures, videos, etc. - All free!"
<Matto> By "all free" they mean after they confirm your age using your credit card.
<Rach> The viruses and trojans are free.
<Rach> Might even have a worm or two!
<Rach> Totally free!
<Pariah> Just like real sex.
<Matto> Damn skippy.
<Pariah> Rife with disease.
<TehJosh> lol
<Matto> Yeah. But the good part about computers is you can reformat.
<Matto> My penis doesn't do that.
<Pariah> Nor mine.
<Matto> I don't know whether that's good or bad.
<Matto> Because I've never seen a penis reformatted and I doubt I'd enjoy it.
#1509 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<lambda> my away msg on AIM is "partying @ the dunes"
<lambda> that way people think i am popular
<lambda> but its in a MMO
#378 (+|-) (Rated: 2) [QDigg / QShare]
<chisoxiest> is it just me... or does eveyone think that quadrapelegics are greedy?
<chisoxiest> "i can't reach that"
<chisoxiest> "i'm not tall enough"
<chisoxiest> i mean c'mon now
#501 (+|-) (Rated: 2) [QDigg / QShare]
<@discordia> Eck: that means you can't use it
<@discordia> sorry
<@Host> ya u cant
<@discordia> you're both a woman who can become pregnant and malaysian
<@discordia> so you crap out
<~Eck> im not fucking malaysian
<@Host> u told me u was
<@discordia> but you are a woman?
<@discordia> PWNED
#2075 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<exceion> This is fucken horrible
<exceion> dow down 504 pts
<P3ngy> yea and still going
<exceion> i know
<`WarpKat> parachutes! get your parachutes here! $5,000.72 per person! jump off a tall building and go down with your stocks! parachutes!
<CaliQuiksilver> lol
<CaliQuiksilver> why the .72 ?
<`WarpKat> it looks good on a balance sheet when it's rounded up ^_^
#2382 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<@whales> jacking off in a theatre
<@whales> http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/f7a03edbd7/pee-wee-gets-an-ipad
<@evul> you know..
<@evul> the guy in front of pee wee had a lot in common with Lincoln
<@whales> hahaha
<@evul> both shot in the back of the head in a theatre
<@sysErroR> lmao
#2305 (+|-) (Rated: 3) [QDigg / QShare]
<+timtux> M07w: may i lick on you?
<+M07w> only if you wish to be punched in the face with AIDS
#828 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<nenolod> one of the stupid fratboy neighbours got his nuts bit off by their pet dog.
<nenolod> something about throwing rocks at the dog was not found to be agreeable.
#1637 (+|-) (Rated: 2) [QDigg / QShare]
<iMaal> wtf
<iMaal> i listened half the metallica album with no sound on :D
#655 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<dunce> VAGINAL INTERCOURSE
<+Vladimir_Marenus> IN THE MISSIONARY POSITION
<+Vladimir_Marenus> FOR THE PURPOSE OF PROCREATION
#1934 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Mike_Wx> there might be a market for that
<Mike_Wx> targeted commercials to your kids
<Mike_Wx> could be a service
<Austin> Introducing Clean Your Room, only $19.99, batteries not included
<dampeoples> heh
<dampeoples> comes with optional ass kicking
#1663 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<carpark> why doesn't it work for canada
<+lactaid> because we don't live in canada
<the_bandi> because canada doesn't exist
<jeek> I've been there!
<stewie> hahaha
<carpark> so, basically i've been to the dev/null of the earth for a fishing trip??
#2467 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Kin> I can't believe I get made fun of all day for being a weeaboo by people who spend their time playing nothing but japanese games, and arguing which miku song is the best -___-
#836 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<JNSamuel> domains should be free.
<discordia> yea I believe that .com domains should be free
<discordia> because knowledge is free
<discordia> and domains provide knowledge
<discordia> so
<discordia> ....
<JNSamuel> .info, too
<JNSamuel> .org, too
<discordia> well I think .info should be free
<discordia> .com maybe not
<discordia> cause it's supposed to be commercial
<JNSamuel> com = commercial
<discordia> but
<discordia> yea
<discordia> like
<discordia> .org and .info
<discordia> should be free
<JNSamuel> org = organization, mostly non profit
<discordia> since most .orgs are fucking non-profit
<discordia> yup
<discordia> lawl
<JNSamuel> lawlsnap
<discordia> great minds think alike
<JNSamuel> <3
<discordia> dude I gotta qb that
<discordia> <3
#312 (+|-) (Rated: 2) [QDigg / QShare]
<Tigerlilley> Well, this isn't a full sex story but it was still pretty embarrasing:
<Tigerlilley> I'd just gotten out of the shower, and walked into the kitchen to grab a drink. Theonly thing in there was milk.
<Tigerlilley> Because I am retarded
<Tigerlilley> I spilt it all over myself
<Tigerlilley> So I'm in my underwear, white stuff all over my chin, neck and chest
<Tigerlilley> and my flatmate walks in
<Tigerlilley> looks at me
<Tigerlilley> and says
<Tigerlilley> "goddamn thats some scary de ja vu"
<Tigerlilley> :(
#2473 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<+ISwoonForObama> :)
<+ISwoonForObama> So anyway, I was in drag yesterday at Madonna's new concert tour Sticky Celebration.
#2085 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
*** Lundor sets the channel topic to "crystal sucks VIRGINA"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Lundor sets the channel topic to "crystal sucks VIRGINA"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
<Lundor> I have a better one
<Shiny-Umbreon> T_T
*** Lundor sets the channel topic to "MISERY sucks My PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
<Lundor> XD
*** Lundor sets the channel topic to "MISERY sucks My PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Lundor sets the channel topic to "MISERY sucks My PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
*** Banshee_Trio sets the channel topic to "lundor sucks PENIS"S if this topic changes it's true".
#1887 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Capn_Refsmmat> Wikipedia has a site for long-term strategic planning where you can suggest what they should do over the next five years
<Capn_Refsmmat> one is a free open-content porn site
<Moled> what could possibly go wrong? :p
<Capn_Refsmmat> I wonder what vandalism would look like on an open-content porn site...
<Capn_Refsmmat> Probably blanking pages and replacing them with "hahahaha penis!!!"
<Raxo> and tubgirl
<Raxo> and 2g1c
<thetree> People in full victorian dress.
<thetree> Ceiling Cat.
<Munga> Nude pictures of Bea Arthur.
#189 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<Zuuzou> hello everyone
<pronto> hi, im masturbating
<pronto> how are you?
* coldvodka kills a kitten
* pronto eats that kitten
<coldvodka> cat, the other white meat
<pronto> baby, the other other white meat
#1283 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Ires> No, seriously. It -was- discovered through my genitals.
//latex allergies
#1748 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
[22:31] <+Bacta> Raise your hand if you think I'm a troll!
[22:31] <+Nirvy> o/
[22:31] <+tyw7> I
[22:31] <+Gary> o/
[22:31] <+Levia> o/
[22:31] <+Gary> oh /me hides
[22:31] <+myko> o/
[22:31] <+Bacta> :(
[22:31] <+Nirvy> LMFAO
[22:31] <+readyou> \o/
[22:31] <+elky> go figure.
[22:31] <+Nirvy> \o/
#1975 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Diablo-D3> Salty: so, Im reading dienetics
<Diablo-D3> wait sorry, not dianetics
<Diablo-D3> "a new slant on life"
<Salty> D3: Why would you ever read something like that.
<Diablo-D3> in the first 18 pages
<Salty> You realized that there is no god?
<Diablo-D3> LRH says "lie to yourself" "strive to be a slave" and "the universe only exists in your mind and the minds of others"
* Salty heils.
#857 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<@Bentley> "This makes Bus Driver unlike any other driving game - the experience of driving a bus is very different from blazing through a racing circuit. "
<@Bentley> Yes, it is
<@Bentley> One is awesome and loads of fun, the other is driving a fucking bus
#965 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Gil_> the one I hate most is for directions. N, E, S, W = Never Eat Soggy Waffles
<Gil_> how the hell is that supposed to help anything
<Gil_> if you cant memorize 4 letters, I feel sorry for that person
<IPNixon> i've actually heard "never eat shredded wheat" for that
<helf2> heh
<IPNixon> and i was like "wtf why not, it's delicious"
<@techfury90_b1k> IPNixon, yeah i've seen that one too
<IPNixon> but it made sense (for me, anyway) when i found out i was allergic to wheat all along!
<helf2> never entertain skanky women is my favorite
<IPNixon> LOL
<Gil_> LOL!!!!
<@techfury90_b1k> LOL
<IPNixon> that's good
#1226 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<samy> hey guys
<samy> you won't believe this
<samy> i just checked the balance of my bank account
<samy> from a WEB BROWSER
<DigDug> WHAT
<samy> this is amazing
#2210 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<LoupDeFur> no lol im a virgin
<Mym|packing> There are people who can help you with that problem Loup.
<Mym|packing> Just go to Nevada. =)
<OpenSource> problem with being a virgin... first to get sacrificed when the aztecs rise again.
<LoupDeFur> lol Im fine im saving it for a loved one
<LoupDeFur> or when im drunk
#1473 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<@EMOjo> fuck
<@EMOjo> i need a beer
<Shit_Nuggeta> go fuck one
<Shit_Nuggeta> Oh beer
<Shit_Nuggeta> not bear
<@EMOjo> ...
<Shit_Nuggeta> My bad
<@EMOjo> LOL
#709 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<@Nick> guess i wont be bending over then
<%Eck> yes, you will
* Eck reaps
<@Nick> oh baby u only have to ask
* Nick bends
#716 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<~peer> use your big boy words
<RageMachine> peer is a whore
<@discordia> brbshower
<RageMachine> big enough for you? or do you want to see my cawk?
<RageMachine> PWN
<RageMachine> that my my glory moment, and the glory hole for peer
<~peer> you have no cock, fucksake; you haven't even went through puberty yet
<~peer> fucking nigra
<~peer> PWNED
#2319 (+|-) (Rated: -1) [QDigg / QShare]
<bear> Destroy my forrest?? ill fuck ur wive hilbilly!!!!!!!
* Dev sets mode +a #Smurfin sysErroR
* sysErroR sets ban on *!*GatewayX@*.dsl.wchtks.sbcglobal.net
* sysErroR has kicked bear from #Smurfin (your mother told me you were an accident.)
#1206 (+|-) (Rated: 2) [QDigg / QShare]
<Dynamic> I've done the irc/chat etc thing for years, so I'm kinda over it
<Dynamic> and meeting people online
<Dynamic> aside from the very obvious
<Dynamic> its easier than picking up a chick irl on a weekday, and its better than porn
#2464 (+|-) (Rated: 2) [QDigg / QShare]
<SnowGryphon> At a local internet cafe, I saw the most curious sight - a young man running a browser in a virtual machine and posting on PS3-centric forums. I became aware of the fact that the virtual machine software was linking the host and the VM so that the VM could use the net. Thus, I was given the rare privilege of witnessing an actual troll under a (NAT) bridge.
#1430 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<Sick_Silent> I think IRC is making me more USAian.
<Sick_Silent> Perverted, racist, sexist, retarded, dumb and lazy
<ATXTheKiller> You forgot fat.
<Cosbydaf> *a tears runs down my cheek as I gaze into an American flag waving in the sunset, while eating Mcdonalds and watching a shitty movies*
<Sick_Silent> Oh I forgot! No taste for good food
#860 (+|-) (Rated: 4) [QDigg / QShare]
* Jobe pokes Joti in the other chan
<@Jobe> lol
<@Nick> #cyber ?
#2314 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Alasserya> IT'S FUCKING COLD
<Alasserya> ( 30 degrees out. )
<Seryth> I wish it were 30 degrees here. ._.
<Ariel> Cold?
<Ariel> It's 30 degrees here, and I haven't even bothered to put on a shirt yet. (No, no pics)
..time passes..
* Regris flops on Ariel and uses her as a pillow.
* Ariel eeps
<LoneGamer> hope you've got a shirt on by now ari >.>
<Ariel> Hm?
<Ariel> Oh! ._.;
#1166 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
(+MeTaL) I can do anything on IRC bish
(+CalebB) even have sex
(+MeTaL) exactly
(+MeTaL) so I'm like an e-pimp
(+CalebB) thats sexy
(+MeTaL) horny girls dig e-pimps
(+MeTaL) ballin'
(+MeTaL) 8D
#1610 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<Pixelate> OMG
<Pixelate> I won 2.5million dollars on the lottery which i didnt even by a ticket for!!!!
<Pixelate> OMG Im so lucky!
<Pixelate> it must be true coz i got a email with like 5 spelling mistakes saying i did
<Pixelate> all i have to do is give them my bank details!!
#1653 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
Verlust: Twey loves NAMBLA
Twey: Uh
Twey: Maybe I would, if I knew what they were :-P
*Twey checks*
Twey: Oh ah
#880 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<@discordia> I still say Teressa is a trap until pictures are provided
<@discordia> No offense Teressa
<&Teressa> trap??
<@discordia> yes
<&Teressa> WTF are you talking about discordia?
<@discordia> A trap is a chick that really isn't a chick
<@discordia> aka A DUDE NEEGAR
<@discordia> looks all sexy till you notice her dick is bigger than yours
<&Jobe> this is sounding like discordia's personal experiance
* Jobe nods
<&Teressa> Dude if I had my own dick I wouldnt be setting here at the pc :P
#1160 (+|-) (Rated: 1) [QDigg / QShare]
<_kr4m3r> so many fucking criminals, its bullshit
<foniks`> heh, if we sent all the criminals to some empty continent and just left them there to die
<foniks`> and showed up like 50yrs later like, "sup?"
<foniks`> whatd u think they'd say?
<FoSZoR[bg]> something along the lines of, "G`Day mate"
#1448 (+|-) (Rated: 0) [QDigg / QShare]
<`WarpKat> fist, we state that girls require time and money:
<`WarpKat> Girls = Time x Money
<`WarpKat> and as we all know, "Time IS money":
<`WarpKat> Time = Money
<`WarpKat> THEREFORE:
<`WarpKat> Girls = Money x Money = Money^2
<`WarpKat> and because Money is the "root of all evil"
<`WarpKat> Money = SQR( Evil )
<`WarpKat> THEREFORE:
<`WarpKat> Girls = (SQR( Evil ) )^2
<`WarpKat> and we are forced to conclude:
<`WarpKat> Girls = Evil
<PapaSmurf-> lmao `WarpKat
<`WarpKat> so you see? girls are evil. period.
